Wednesday, December 8, 2004

TV time out!

Can we just assess what we've been watching people? And I don't mean just "watching" but we are sucked into these things as if it were some sort of violent freeway accident. You don't want to watch but you just can't help yourself. Like lemmings to a cliff, that of the overweight tune in weekly to get a glimpse of what the other side might be like. I'm right there with you, I must confess, and as if I weren't disgusted with myself enough for simply that I've figured out their ulterior motive I'm just plain livid with myself.

You've got The Swan on Monday, The Biggest Loser on Tuesday, and don't correct me if I'm have Extreme Makeover on Thursday. Now, in a nutshell, they've gone from simply feeding you images of size 0, annorexic, waifs making you think this is what a REAL woman should look like to what I'd say is much worse. Between these three shows you are pretty much forced into believing one or all of the following:

1.) The only way to lose weight is to starve yourself and workout until you puke at which time you will be cast out because you haven't lost ENOUGH!

2.) The only way to find self-worth and confidence is to have your nose broken just to straighten it, the fat sucked from your body with a straw attached to a high power vacuum, severe ta-ta realignment defying all the laws of gravity, and then have some of the aforementioned fat "redistributed" to your lips.

3.) The only way to feel truly beautiful is to not look in a mirror for 3 months and then, in front of millions, reveal the new you at which time you exclaim "I look nothing like me. I'm beautiful." (and then they tell you that you just don't qualify for the pageant because you aren't quite pretty ENOUGH).

HELLO??? Am I the only one that finds this fundamentally WRONG? Please tell me this is not really the only way. If so, what the hell am I working so hard for? Now, I feel I need to make one thing clear. If at any time after my weight loss journey Extreme Makeover should come calling on ME, I will be in that overwhelmingly unattractive paper robe in a hot second BUT hell if it's going to determine THIS girl's self-worth. The hard work I put into losing the weight IN A HEALTHY MANOR will determine just how strong I really am. Going to the gym almost every day will help find MY inner self. There is no secret pill or voodoo spell. It's hard work and determination (more than most people have) and it's quite simply...ME! No one but me can make the necessary decisions I need to make to lose the weight. No one is force feeding me Ben & Jerry's...though that doesn't sound half bad in a sick sort of way. If I get upset and eat myself straight into a coma...yep, still all me. SLIPPING off program is far from FALLING off program. Every time I slip I'm ok as long as I get right back on program as soon as possible. I am not a failure if I eat badly one day or even one week. I am a failure if I GIVE UP and THIS girl ain't givin' up.

I am now down 24 pounds. I've said goodbye to the 350's, the 340's and almost the 330's in about 2 1/2 months. I have conquered one major holiday and I am on to the next. I have lost a combined 7 inches in various places on my body and NONE of it was sucked out by a high powered vacuum. Maybe I was wrong when I said that one day I would be fierce...maybe I already am!

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