Sunday, January 1, 2006

What a difference a week makes

I have been on an eleven-day spree of laziness. Others call it vacation but that would suggest taking time off work with intent to go somewhere or do something. I, however, did nothing...and loved it.

With the exception of when I had my nephew for two nights the rest of the time was spent in a manner that would suggest I was training for the Couch Potato Olympics. I even have a touch of a sprained hand from the frantic channel changing. I think that other than when I vacuumed one afternoon that the most exercise I got was walking to the kitchen for snacks or walking to either go to the bathroom or go to bed. All of which I planned around when Lola needed to go outside so as not to overdo it. I watched movies and slept in. I ate out and ordered in. I read a little and napped a lot. I was the poster child for two of the seven deadly sins (though familiar with Dante's I prefer Brad Pitt's explanation MUCH better). GLUTTONY and SLOTH! That was me.

I also avoided the scale for fear it would be insanely high. Finally on Friday I managed to muster up the gumption to get on the scale and face my maker. I got on and off of it 5 times to make sure the number was right. I had somehow managed to lose 4 pounds. Uh huh, you read that right...FOUR! As of then I was at 344. WOO HOO! New Year's Eve has since come and gone so who knows what it's at now but I'll avoid the scale a few more days and see what Friday brings.

Today I sat eating Taco Bell as a final hurrah to 2005 before I renewed my devotion to me and turned on the Discovery Health Channel. It was show after show of morbidly obese people and gastric bypass surgeries and it was disturbing to say the least. I eventually tried to find something else to watch and flipped through channels (despite my sprained hand) only to be sucked into the Shop At Home channel just as they were showing a treadmill. I've been wanting a treadmill FOREVER!!!!! I haven't gotten one because I don't have the money to shell out all at once like that. They were offering free shipping and you could stretch the payments over 5 months.

I was torn. I couldn't make the decision to call. I'd missed the big description of all it’s features and was just going off what I could see. They showed the little hand weights that come on it for you to grab as you're working out. They showed the shock absorption and made you think intently about how it would save your knees. Then, the's got a built in fan right smack in front of you for while you're working out. Though it's still going to be hard for me I made a mad dash for the phone as I only had 2 minutes to call. I'm such a sucker but come on...I'd just watched a story on the half ton man. It's like the two channels were in cahoots or something. It worked like a charm.

In 21 days I will be the proud owner of a treadmill (no, not a towel rack). It will be big. It will be pretty. It will call my living room home so it can stare and me while I'm sitting on the couch and guilt me into exercising. I will walk on it while I watch TV so I can't ever say I couldn't do it because my show was on and it was in the other room...besides, the invention of TiVo pretty much ruined that excuse for me. I will do it every day and I will turn into a svelte hottie before your eyes.

My week of gluttony and sloth has left me feeling rested and ready for the journey again so I'd say this vacation was a smashing success. I'm going to need that week of rest to make up for all the over time I'm going to have to put in to be able to afford my treadmill. 2006 is my year...mark my words.

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